Ggggggggggggggggg note
8/28/22 - #2
I SEE MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE TOMORROW!!!!
I don't have the words nor time to explain what they mean to me. The first MCR song I heard was Mama, sung by my crush when I was 13. At the time, it fucking scared me! I'd never heard lyrics like that before, and I can't say I liked them. The second MCR song I heard, also sung by my middle school crush, was Na Na Na... and this time I was interested. It was just the right amount of 'edgy' to lure me out of my shell and want to know more. I memorized the lyrics so my crush and I could sing them together, and I let them tell me all about the killjoys and the break-up and how hot Gerard was. They were my first crush, the first openly nonbinary person I knew, and the person behind my gay relization.
Gerard Way and My Chemical Romance then cemented this realization in me as I moved into high school and began listening to the music for real. Twice a week my mother would leave for a few hours in the afternoons, and twice a week I would loop youtube playlists in the background while playing hunger games simulators in minecraft. My Chemical Romance, Panic at the Disco, Fall Out Boy, and I can't remember what else. It was MCR that stuck with me.
When I changed my name, I changed one of my legal names to "Gerard".
Gerard was who inspired me to come out as trans in the first place.
I don't even know where to begin with the importance of the killjoys to me.
Fuck, is my life inconsistant. I am inconsistant. But this band has been with me since 2013, and they are the one consistancy I have. Back in 2013 I said to my crush, "When they get back together, I'll go see them". I'm not sure why I thought that, when at that age I had never even been to a concert before, but something about this band inspired me. Now, nearly 10 years later, I finally get to do it. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I don't have the words.
By the way, some site updates since my last blog post:
- an altar dedicated to my patron saint Judas, within the semi-hidden Mausoleum
- an archive page for my blog posts
- a page for dog photos!! One of the albums is still unfinished, but it's a good start
- many new poems!!!
- I've begun adding alt text to my images and graphics
- I've discovered how to add music to pages. So far, Judas' altar is the only page with music, but of course I have plans to add more!
- lastly, lots of tiny fixes and tweaks!!!!
See you soon -- and remember to stay true and strong!! -Val
